In 2009 the Povey family decided to go on holiday to France in the caravan….. OK so how bad can it be…..
Day 1…… the Journey
9.00 am – Set off for Holiday in France
9.50 am – Caravan tyre sets on fire on M11
10.00 am – M11 brought to a crawl
10.05 am – Phone RAC – Suspect the problem isn’t Fossil Fuels
10.15 am – Why us?
10.50 am – Police Arrive
****** Holiday nearly 2 hours old ******
11.15 am – Big Lorry Arrives
11.30 am – Cant Get Caravan on Lorry
11.40 am – Children beginning to drive emergency services insane
11.50 am – Build a Wooden Ramp….
12:10 pm – We are on our way to Harlow
12.30 pm – Arrive at Quick fit in Harlow
12.40 pm – But alas there is no tyre available
12.50 pm – Clare spills pint of milk on passenger seat
1.00 pm – Michael takes us to Welwyn Garden City (Abandon Michael’s Lorry with our Caravan)
1.05 pm – Michael realises his bottom is wet
1.15 pm – Children begin to drive Michael insane
1.30 pm – Get tyre in Welywn
2.00 pm – Re-united with Lorry and Caravan
2.50 pm – Back on the road
***** Ferry has now been round the cape of good hope and back*****
So we are now half way through the first day of our holiday….. what else could happen.
This is the second set of walls sausages… so why a disaster?
I had a tooth abscess, and thinking the dutiful wife had put my tablet next to a beaker I duly took it.
Arthur takes tablets, they are kept under lock and key at the doctors surgery.
On the sausage morning I took the tablets by mistake…. It made me a little hyper and I threw the first packet of sausages at the floor…. on the plus side, we now know how flat a saussage can get.
OK… one glass of white and clare walks into a tent peg – and takes the – and I quote – “Guide” rope with her….
That “Guide” rope certainly is dangerous.
So -off to the zoo….what could happen….
There are 2000 people in the audience – meaning that if disaster is to strike one person that is a 0.05% chance of that person being me. There was a great bird show, where the birds swooped accross the water and on to the back of the stands.
Look at the size of this bird… look at the power in the wings…
you would not believe it, but for the first time ever a bird flew right into some poor blokes face and knocked his glasses off. 2000 people made the same noise as the crowd at Wimbledon when the ball hits a line judge.
On the plus side my glasses were not broken and the rest of the family laughed at my expense.
So what exactly can I sit on now?
Freya and I agree that Clare must have weakened it.
Ever the active dad I took the kids roller-skating in the dark…
but at what price? – 2 Broken Bones….
No swimming for Arthur for 45 days!
So – we set off home – on schedule….
But the tyre went down – again, and again and again. There nowhere open to fix it in France – at all – it turns out to be a cracked rim.
16 Hours drive and only 530 miles to go at 40 miles per hour
with in excess of 21 service station stops to inflate the tyre.
Yes – we missed the ferry again.
Holidays – love them – so relaxing.
Once I had bought a new wheel, the RAC Man came to the rescue and fixed it for us;-)
Roger Povey 